As opposed to the other posts on Lose an Eye, I've given a small amount of thought how to usher out 2007 and ring in 2008.
I could do a nifty little year in review but, on a blog at least, that kind of smacks a little bit too much of "self-congratulatory back slapping" for my taste. Kind of like listing your' "best posts" over on the side-bar of your blog. Blah.
I could just post a snappy picture and holiday greetings and watch silently as 2007 slowly fades over the horizon in the rearview but, well, its been done by a LOT of blogs and, you know, they've all taken most of the good pictures. (ditto for the holiday themed music videos)
I briefly tinkered with taking a thinly veiled shot at my political opposites but (for one) I was beaten to it and (secondly) my political opposites probably don't read this blog and wouldn't realize it was a shot anyway.
So, what to do? How to properly cap off 2007 in a style suitable for Lose an Eye with the quality that readers have come to expect?
I present to you the Lose an Eye 2008 "Wish List"....
1. May Mrs. White never go away. - Yes, we have poked fun at her blind love and devotion to Houston's current mayor, and yes, her editorials are nothing more than contradictions wrapped in logical fallacies surrounded by dodgy conlusions. I "get" all of that, and I see why thinking people are often frustrated with her. Today's editorial is a prime example:
patrons of strip clubs will be tapped for a $5 admission fee — what some have dubbed a "pole" tax. Most of the money is to pay for services for victims of sexual violence. It is fitting that an industry known for its objectification of women's bodies be a source of funds to support rape prevention and victim support.
Club owners say they don't like the link between their businesses and the crime of sexual assault. That's an understandable complaint, but the logic is tortured. The law doesn't imply that those who patronize "adult" entertainment venues are rapists. Rather the law recognizes that a small percentage of the revenues of an industry that trades in women's sexuality ought to be returned to the community to deal with sex crimes largely perpetrated against women.
I ask you: Where else can you find an arugment of that type that bumps into the logic wall of so many fallacies at once?
For the sake of the funny bone of EVERY Houstonian, I hope Mrs. White continues dishing drivel without pause(or thought for that matter). Face it, if J. Howard Gibbons ever got hit on the head and suddenly became self-aware the Houston Chronicle would be a lot more boring overnight.
2. That the blog revolution, doesn't fail. - Say what you want about the failures of the Chron, one of her bigger successes is the emergence of so many quality content blogs focusing on many issues that don't fit in the dead tree edition. One wonders what Matt Stiles did before he found Google docs, and what Dwight was doing before selectively linking to blogs and other stories? Are there certain people who shouldn't blog? You bet. But there are plenty of Chron bloggers whose content demands you pay attention especially during an election year.
So far the Chron has done a good job providing readers with a good mix of content. Here's hoping this only improves in 2008.
3. May the 2008 political elections be everything we think they will be.
And by that, I mean entertaining. And no, despite on-line assertions by others to the contrary, I really don't care WHICH party gets the overall "win". I just hope that we don't get bland elections. Let's have some "fun" in our politics this year. The Rosenthal kerfluffle is a good start, I'm sure there will be more to come. So far in 2007 we've had sex scandals and rumors and resignations and defiance. All we need is for William Jefferson Clinton to be caught in the ladies room in a Louisiana truck stop with three cocktail waitresses with "Go Hillary" bumper stickers stuck on their butts. We've got to get this out of the way now because in 2010 all we've got to look forward to is Bill White vs. Kay Bailey for Gov. (Zzzzzzzz.) Heck, "issues" don't matter unless your candidate of choice is in the middle of a scandal. THAT'S when you hear that the hope is the race will be run on the "issues". Americans want sizzle, send the steak back and char that sum-bitch so it sounds like a standing ovation at the flea circus. This is Government we're talking about, it's not like its life or death right?
Vive la scandal in 2008!
4. A little less public policy designed to appeal to our maternal instncts please.
How about public policy designed to, novel concept alert: benefit the public? And by benefit I don't mean to give them what you think they need, but give the people what they want. In other words, lets stop legislating morality and start legislating with common sense. I realize that there are people out there who think that my being able to purchase a fifth of Tito's Handmade Vodka on the Sabbath will surely bring the fires of God down upon their homes, but these same people probably would have thought that ending prohibition was going to accomplish the same thing. It's a documented fact that fire did not suddenly sweep in and devour the country when it became legal to purchase liquor again. So, everyone take a deep breath. The following items are not going to bring a sudden end to the country either:
Legalized casino gambling, an elimination of "blue" laws, holistic sex education, the teaching of evolution, people choosing to not believe in evolution, men paying for lap dances, women paying for lap dances, homosexual marriage, heterosexual marriage, women getting abortions, women deciding to put the child up for adoption, reasonable attempts to keep abortion rare but legal, happy holidays, choosing to say something more specific, a Bible as a tribute to a deceased individual, a Torah as a tribute to a deceased individual, NO scriptural text as a tribute to a deceased individual, booty-shaking cheerleaders, re-examining the "war on drugs", putting criminals in prison, letting some non-violent offenders out, people speaking Spanish, people speaking English, ballots in several languages, teaching the basics, diversity, those who are not all that diverse, securing the border, showing compassion for those who are here already, a Democratic President, a Republican President, and (for God's sake) can we just agree once and for all that Football is NOT that important in the general scheme of things?
Let's build some infrastructure and provide for the common defense. THEN look at the money we have left and decide what is the best way to allocate it out. And no more debt spending. And no, budgets aren't moral documents. They're financial documents. Don't buy into that tripe.
5. Last, but not least: Happy New Year!!!
Here's to a full and successful year of blogging all things Houston, Texas with the occasional stray post poking fun at foreigners thrown in for good measure.
Salud!!












